I look at the mirror longer than needed, more frequently than necessary. Not out of vanity, but confusion. I haven’t caught up to who is staring back at me. This woman, wider and somehow both softer and harder than the girl I used to see. I am forever caught off guard that the face looking back at me is in fact my own reflection. Reflecting my lack of sleep, the worry I have swallowed and stored and allowed to make weary the kink in my back and twitch of my eye. There she looks back at me, searching me as I implore her. Where did I go? I gave myself over to mother, surrendered myself to a love that means all of me for all of him.
I gave myself away.
It was easier than it should have been. When you fail to take root in the soils of a firm foundation, blowing through the storms of life takes no effort at all. Identity can be a fickle thing. When the all-encompassing role of mom and sanctifying role of wife find their way to your path all of you can become all of them and what remains is an empty cup looking anywhere to be filled.
An empty cup can be dangerous. In the search for something more, we can (without realizing it) give more of ourselves to more spaces and time than we can be spread.
Dear Moms, I see you.
Mom with averted gaze and tear rimmed eyes? I see you.
Mom with weary heart and downcast shoulders? I see you.
Mom with raised voice and sharp tongue, pleading with small children for quiet? I see you.
Mom with babe held close, swaying back and forth for hours on end? I see you
Mom standing on the other side of a door in the middle of the night, desperate and weeping for rest you are sure will never come? I see you.
I see my reflection in all of you. My heart breaks in your pain and discouragement. The strain of navigating the weeds of these early years with your children and growing through your relationships with your husbands can feel like too much to bear.
Juggling roles of wife, companion, friend, housekeeper, cook…we can be left feeling as though we’ve given all of ourselves away.
You, mom weary and defeated? He sees you.
You, mom sick from exhaustion? He sees you.
You, mom without patience and lacking grace? He sees you.
You, mom afraid that life’s many distractions and requirements will create a wedge you and your husband won’t survive? He sees you.
You, mom looking through critical and confused eyes at the reflection staring back at you? He sees you.
He sees all of you and He loves you still.
Today may you lean in to this beautiful truth that you are never alone.
You, mom are wholly and dearly loved, created with purpose, unique in beauty and equipped with all you need.
You, mom are ENOUGH.
Come as you are, with all that you are and lay your burdens at His feet.
‘…And this is the boldness we have in God’s presence; that if we ask God for anything that agrees with what he wants, he hears us. If we know he hears us every time we ask him, we know we have what we ask from him’ 1 John 5:14-15
Today moms, may you be encouraged!